Dear Large Breasted Woman at the Gym:
I couldn't help but notice you attempting to "run" on the treadmill yesterday. The idea that you would show up in a camisole and a regular bra was enough to make me giggle. Your workout buddy staring at your bouncing bossoms the entire time was also quite funny (maybe he is your boyfriend?). May I suggest you invest in a VERY SUPPORTIVE sports bra before you attempt to run again. It's no wonder you only lasted about 30 seconds running at a time... OUCH!!