Friday, November 20, 2009

Society's double standard.

[Steps up onto Soapbox.]
I have noticed a trend recently that has been pretty frustrating for me. It is something about our society that will forever drive me insane. No one ever told me I was killing myself when I was gaining weight yearly and shopping in the plus sizes. The flip side? As I lose weight and get to a very healthy weight range, I'm starting to get "comments." Comments about how thin I am. Comments when I pass on eating sugary foods when with friends. Comments from family about how I have got to STOP LOSING or I will be skeletal. Comments from "well meaning" people who are "worried about me."
WHAT? Are you serious? Here is the double standard. I EAT all the time. I don't need comments from people because I don't eat junk food. Seriously... do you think people are thin because they eat whatever they want?!? NO WAY!! SO... in an attempt to not be a hypocrite.. this letter is for my friends.. who I love.. who I worry about!

Dear Friend:
I LOVE YOU!!! I hope that this letter will prove just that. See, when I was 200 lbs, no one mentioned it to me. I know that I KNEW how big I was but I don't think I really GOT it. I had no idea how much life I was missing, but when you know better, you do better... and I'm doing better. Every time you feed your emotions, or snack obsessively, or just put things in your mouth without thinking about it, you are hurting yourself. I think you already know this. Overeating for me was always a form of self-loathing. Whether I knew it or not at the time, I was punishing myself... for not being what I wanted to be.
I was always looking for the easy way out. A quick fix. Guess what? Changing your life by changing what you eat isn't nearly as difficult as society would have you believe. Exercising is not just good for you, it makes you FEEL good!! I have lost 80 lbs in 10 months. It wasn't any harder for me than anything else I've done in my life. To be honest, it was almost easy.
The mental strength that comes when you push yourself is priceless. The feeling of joy when you realize you DO HAVE CONTROL... is something I can never describe. The thought that when you walk in the room, people notice (and not because they are talking about how big you are) is really amazing.
Stop punishing your body and your health by eating CRAP! Get off the couch and move a little. Don't be afraid to push past your limits. Don't worry that you CAN'T!! YOU CAN!! YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE STANDING IN YOUR WAY!! Change your life now... because you ARE WORTH THE EFFORT!!! And you DESERVE to feel good about you!!
Your friend,
Karilynn

8 comments:

Moi said...

I LOVE YOU!!!!! People will always try to pick on you but its easier to pick on the skinny girl than the fat girl cause you don't want to see the fat girl cry. If your friends and family can't get that you are happier without shoveling fatty food into your mouth fuck em. You don't need negativity in your life. I am sure no one tells Mr. Skinny Minnie that he is killing himself

WeightWatcher Mama said...

well said! be proud of how far you have come! you have done a wonderful job!

Mindy said...

Dear Karilynn,
I’m going to assume that that letter was written for me too. So, thank you for caring! Thank you for telling me that I’m killing myself. Thank you for LITERALLY telling me my "ass was a phenomenon”! (NO really she did say that when I was like 8 months pregnant.) At the time I was a little pissed and in my mind I’m sure I called you a bitch once or twice. But here’s the thing, I was in such freaking denial I can’t even believe it. I didn’t see myself and how big I was getting. Then you walked into that baby shower half the woman you were just 6 months before and you told me my ass was huge… That was it. BLINDERS OFF!!! And suddenly I saw it. So, thank you! Next time try a little tact or something… like this letter. It isn’t quite as harsh as what you said to me before but a much needed message.
I love you too!!!
Mindy
PS. My gigantic ass thanks you too! And my husband! And daughter, although she doesn’t know it quite yet.

Vicki said...

You are AWESOME!
That is all I have to say today :)

Karilynn said...

Mindy!!
I'm sorry I told you how incredibly round your butt was while you were pregnant. Very insensitive of me. I would say that I was probably just jealous. I WOULD TOTALLY take that butt if it meant I would be having a girl. Not fair that you only had to try once to get yours! ;o) Next time I'm pregnant, tell me what you really think of my body. (Oh wait DH says there will NEVER be a next time!)I LOVE YOU!! Nothing thrills me more than watching you shrink.
LOVE SONG!

Misty said...

This is totally an inspiration! You are freakin' awesome. :)

Lena's Mom said...

Unfortunatley people will always find flaws in others, but be confident in yourself and what you have done to better yourself and your health. You look awesome!

Julia C. said...

Thanks many thanks because your letter makes me feel that you were talking to me. I´ll try the same as you did, thanks again. Julia from Argentina. Julia C.