1000 Miles??

I've been trying to find some sort of goal/focus to get me back on track.  I would love to do another Sprint Triathlon this year and plan on doing another half marathon in June, but I've been looking for something to do right now without much luck.  A friend of mine posted something on her facebook yesterday.  Her goal for the year is to run 1000 miles.  That's a little less than 20 miles a week.. and it sounds BRILLIANT to me!!  I mean really.. why the heck not right?  How fun to keep track of every mile I run with some long/shortterm goal in mind. 

1000 Miles?  Sounds like a plan! ;)

My Lists

I often get asked how to stay motivated to succeed in weight loss.  I wish I had some perfect answer, or that I could simply bottle it and give out samples... but the reality is.. I CANNOT MOTIVATE OTHERS.  We all have different things that drive us.  Different things that keep us going.  Different reasons why we want to succeed.  I am no exception to this.  I must find motivation on days I want to give up.  I HAVE to drag my butt to the gym some days.  I make nutritional bloopers.  I have PMS and chocolate cravings and some days I'm a wreck. 

Life is hard. 

When people ask me for help, I ask them to make 2 lists.  One - of all the reasons they want to succeed and one - of all of the obstacles standing in their way. (You would be surprised how many people NEVER bother making these lists when they realize I have no quick fix.)

And so, for your viewing pleasure.... my NEW lists:

Why I Want to Succeed:

1.  To prove it can be done.  I have done so well in the past at losing, I figured out maintaining for about a year... but when life got harder... I sort of lost it.  Must pull it together again.

2.  To fit [comfortably] into all the cute jeans I was wearing this time last year.

3.  To be a role model.  This is where I would have said, to be around for my kids longer etc... etc... but my focus HAS to change from this.  My 60 year old, incredibly health conscious mother in law has pancreatic cancer and will most likely be gone before spring.... I used to believe that healthy lifestyles = long lives, but it simply isn't true.  This will be my biggest obstacle.  It is incredibly hard mentally for me to work SO hard knowing that all my hard work could be in vein.  MUST find a new focus as my 383rd birthday is simply not a guarantee.

4.  To NOT be a hypocrite.  I know that's probably lame... but I don't want to have to eat all these pretty words I've been typing for 2 years.  I know it's possible... so damn it, I'm going to stick to it.

5.  To fit into the scrubs I bought for school that are too tight to wear in public.  (I start school in 2 weeks and seriously, I bought one pair of scrubs that shouldn't be too tight but are!) BOO!!

6.  To continue to inspire others to dig in and find their motivation.

7.  To keep that WOW factor.  (I can't help but love the "I can't believe you have 4 kids, you are so tiny" comments.

8.  To feel good about me.  Exercise and eating right make me feel euphoric.  Don't want to lose it.

9.  To live life without becoming complacent.  I do not want to be the person who gives up on what I really want because I fall into the "good enoughs." NO NO NO!!!

10.  To be HEALTHY!!  That's right boys and girls.. even though there are no guarantees in quantity of life, I can surely guarantee myself QUALITY of life. 

My Obstacles:

1.  My 4 kiddos.  I don't want to sacrifice time with my children.  I used to believe I was buying myself time, it was a fair trade.  Now, I realize that there is no guarantee that I'm buying time so...

2. School.  I start nursing school in 2 weeks!

3.  Money.  Eating right isn't cheap.

5.  Pancreatic cancer.  My mom-in-laws diagnois of this disease has destroyed a lot of my drive.  Some days, I wonder why I should even bother with all this hard work?  Why should I skip out on overindulgence?  Why bother exercising?  Because none of that seems to matter to pancreatic cancer.  I don't want to die.  And this disease has been a huge reminder to me that life is not guaranteed.  And it pretty much pisses me off.

6. My husband.  My husband has always been my biggest hurdle.  He scowls at me when I cook myself healthy food.  He makes snotty comments when I go to the gym.  He openly voices his annoyance when I spend money on food for myself because ultimately he refuses to eat the way I do.   He even mentioned to me yesterday that he has "no faith in me." As he rolled his eyes at my mention of potty training my 2 year old.  Sometimes I think he WANTS ME to feel like crap.  That he prefers a less confidant me.  He is my sabotage.  He is the one obstacle that I seem to always let defeat me.  I have spent 2 years trying to find a balance only to discover that he is only happy when I don't do for me. 

Reality check:  My list of obstacles is my list of excuses.  In the past I've checked these off the list, one by one... and now... I must figure out how to do it all over again.  Everything is different now.  I am different now.  I have come to realize that there are no guarantees in life, something I used to be sort of, blind to.  I have used my love for life as a motivating factor to DO... and now, I've got to find a whole new reason to succeed.   

 Anyone out there reading, I would love to know....

WHAT DRIVES YOU??? 

 And in case you were interested, here is MY LIST of reasons from day one of this blogging adventure! 

I wonder...

This morning, as I fished my yoga pants from the bottom of my drawer, I couldn't help but laugh at the idea that those particular pants had been "trying not to get their hopes up" every other day I had reached in that drawer for the last 2 months! ;)

Treadmill class sort of felt like punishment for 2 months of being bad.  I ran just a little over 5.5 miles and never quit.. though I felt like dying.  I actually was really interested in the other women on the treadmills.  OF the 10 in the class, at least 5 of them stopped repeatedly during the workout to do things like; drink their water, wipe their face, or stretch.  I see those things as EXCUSES to stop and wondered how many of them had any idea what it meant to REALLY work hard.  It was like a bunch of women who had NO CLUE what it is like to be OBESE.  I found myself wishing so badly that the other ladies in the cardio room were on those machines.  Those ladies are the ones I relate to.. the ones busting their ass at the gym, feeling like it is IMPOSSIBLE to be one of the gals on the treadmill.  I wanted to scream out.. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!  But, I couldn't breath and refused to stop so I just kept on running!

Food for today:

Breakfast: 2 egg whites, 1/4 cup oats cooked in water with 1 t honey and a little cinnamon

Midmorning Snack: One scoop of protein shake (125 calories and 21 g protein) with a small fuji apple.

Lunch: Chicken salad which consisted of 1 roma tomatoe, romaine lettuce, 4.3 ounces of chicken sauteed in balsamic vinegar, a little feta cheese and 2 T of vinageratte dressing (45 calories in 2 T.)

This was YUMMY!!!

Dinner: Taco salad with no processed carbs so.,.. meat, cheese, light sourcream, avocado, FF refried beans, olives, onions, tomato and a WHOLE LOTTA LETTUCE. (This meal was probably way more calories then I needed in one sitting). 

Dessert: (This is a rarity) One tiny scoop (about 1 oz) of mint chocolate brownie ice cream. (It was a birthday party.)

So food wasn't perfect but it was SO much better!  I drank at least 80 ozs of water today and didn't feel hungry at all! :)  Tomorrow is another day.  Can't wait!

Day 1... sorta...

 I decided to start this thing today, even though I knew that day one would NOT be the best example.  I chose this day because last night was my last shift at the hospital. I got home at 7:30 this morning and slept until around 11:45.  This of course means the day looks a lot like a big mess... and I spent most of it on the verge of exhaustion.
Regardless.... todays (VERY BAD) example is:
12 ozs of coffee with 2 packets of truvia and 1 T milk.
One orange
Two 70 calorie string cheeses
One small chili from Wendy's with cheese and onions
One half of a half cobb salad from Wendys
probably around 40 ozs of water
NO EXERCISE.
Lots of things were wrong with this day.  I did NOT consume enough calories, I didn't drink enough water, and I didn't exercise (although I did do a lot of walking/shopping today! ;) )
Tomorrow will be a normal day.  Hopefully the blog will look much better tomorrow evening.
First thing in the morning.. I'm hitting a treadmill class at the gym! YAY!!!

UGH-liness

I moved. 
 I got a job.

I have been eating crap.

I have not been exercising.

I have gained 7 lbs in 2 months. 

Yesterday was the last day of my job.

(My AMAZING Mother-in-law was recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer so I resigned from my job to be home to support my family!)

I have a gym membership.

I have a plan.

Starting TODAY!! 

I am going to lose 10 lbs in one month. 

I am going to exercise at least 5 times a week.

And record all of my activity and everything I eat on this blog DAILY.

I am going to get back to my healthy way of life.

I'm hitting the grocery store and stocking up on produce and protein sources.

I'm going to drink 80-100 ozs of water a day!

I'm going to start feeling AMAZING again! 

Starting weight 132.6!  First thing after I woke up from my last graveyard this afternoon.  THIS IS IT!!  UGH!!

I would love comments!  The more people I know are reading, the more motivated I am.  I love feeling accountable.  Like somehow I'm making a difference.  I love proving that things that seem impossible REALLY ARE possible.  So.. hold me accountable.  :)  ONE MONTH!!  In one month I will be back to 122 lbs or less!  WOOT WOOT!

New Audience, New Voice!

I realize that I am going to have some new traffic to my blog thanks to a crazy idea to send a pic to Bob Harper the BL trainer.  I didn't realize at the time that a zillion people would see it AND that a few of them would be inspired to change their lives because of it. 

A few HUNDRED people have asked how I did it and I hate to disappoint those people so I will answer them as best I can but be warned... my answer may equally disappoint.  This is a story of hard work, skipping Easter candy and SO MUCH MORE!!  Read it if you dare but know in advance that I lost my weight with the good old fashioned sentiment of "EAT LESS MOVE MORE!!"

I was chubby as a child but thinned out around 9th grade and became incredibly active at that time.  I graduated high school, headed off to college (where I ate myself 20 lbs heavier).  I left college after only one semester, met my NOW husband, got pregnant, married and gained another 50 lbs.  One year (and 5 days) after my first son was born I gave birth to my 2nd son.  Over the course of the next 4 years I would occasionally try another fad diet.  Atkins, weight watchers, Jenny Craig, and of course... prescription weight loss pills that made me poop my pants.  ALL of these worked briefly.  All of them became inconvenient incredibly quickly.  All of them rendered me a failure and reaffirmed the idea I had in my head that "it's impossible."   At one point during the 4 years of failure I had a conversation with an internal medicine doctor in which he told me essentially that "weight loss wasn't worth the work".  He told me it was SOOO hard to lose the weight and even harder to keep it off and that I would have to starve myself and run 10 miles a day to even dream about being in my high school jeans.  And with that... I rendered it not only impossible, but foolish, stupid, and a dream not worth working towards.

It's interesting the bigger I got on the outside, the smaller I felt on the inside.

I gave birth to my 3rd son 5 years after my 2nd son was born.  I never even thought about weight loss at this point.  2 years after my 3rd son, my 4th son arrived and I was well over 200 lbs. It was at this point that I decided to EMBRACE my big self.  I asked a close photographer friend to take family pictures for me and I LIKED THEM!

In December of 2008 I finally went and got myself a Lane Bryant Card and bought myself some cute size "2" jeans! (Lane Bryant sells plus size clothes only and they resize them to make yourself feel better that you are a "2" and not a 20!)  Life was going FANTASTIC!  I was pretending to be incredibly happy stuffed into my new jeans.  I was embracing the concept that my size didn't interfere with my ability to be a good mother, wife, friend etc.  And then one day... my bubble got popped and I realized just how big of a lie I was accepting as truth.

That Christmas my boys received snow boards and so did I! I was thrilled to pick up a new sport!  I even went into the sports supply store and squeezed myself into the LARGEST pair of snow pants that they had in the store.  (They were overalls!) I couldn't breath.. but those pants zipped up and became the LAST pair of XXL anything I EVER bought!  Snowboarding was devastating.  I would almost instantly fall.  Once I fell, it was IMPOSSIBLE to get back up.  As you can see from above, my husband is a thin man.  It was his COMPLETE INABILITY TO COMPREHEND how on earth I couldn't just GET UP that really put me in my place.  What the hell was wrong with me?  Why couldn't I get my fat ass up out of the snow? Big AH-HA moment.  My weight WAS interfering with EVERY aspect of my life!!

And finally!!  I got mad!  I got motivated!  I stopped lying to myself!  And I determined to change!

I started telling people that I had to do something to change and my cousin mentioned to me that she was joining a weight loss competition with a group of photographers and I jumped at the opportunity to compete.  It gave me focus, support, and drive.  And for the first time in my life, I admitted that I never followed through with ANYTHING and made it my goal to just FINISH SOMETHING FOR A CHANGE!!! I joined this 5 month competition not knowing what on earth I was doing.. I just KNEW that I was going to do it for 5 months.  AND that whatever I did.. it had to be something I could DO FOREVER!!  I realized then that temporary changes only yield temporary results and I refused to lose weight only to regain it! 

So what did I do?  Well.. I went insane.. I got obsessive.. I freaked out and changed things up here or there but the one thing I always did was NoT EaT SuGaR, WhItE FlOuR, OR DrInK AlCoHoL! I also followed a few guidelines that I picked up from a new friend who happens to be a fantastic personal trainer!   (Click HERE for a list of the "RULES" I followed to lose the weight!) These rules were really the bread and butter of my diet plan.  They forced me to EAT!!  And EAT RIGHT!!  2 concepts I had never before been willing to accept.  I also began a normal exercise regimen.  I was at the gym 5-6 times a week.  I was fortunate enough to know a couple of people who had given me some sort of direction in the gym so I made sure to do 30 minutes of cardio and 20-30 minutes of resistance training EVERY TIME I stepped in the door.  However, I fully embraced the concept that EXERCISE IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO EAT BADLY!!  Exercise was supplemental to my plan.  It fed me MENTALLY when I couldn't feed myself physically, but it is NOT the reason I lost 80+ lbs! 
I know on the Biggest Loser they are always showing everyone MELTING in the gym... but watch seasons where people have thrown the weighins.. they still worked their ass off in the gym.. it was what they put in their mouths that kept weight on!!
I feel like this entry is already WAY too long!!  If you have questions.. feel free to post comments and ask them!  Maybe I'll do a q and a next blog entry! For now... start with the idea that
IT IS POSSIBLE AND YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!

What doesn't kill me...

Ambition: an earnest desire for some type of achievement or distinction, as power, honor, fame, or wealth, and the willingness to strive for its attainment

This morning I decided I was going to take my little guys on a bike ride.  This requires me to put their butts in a trailer with a bent wheel and haul them behind my mountain bike.  I do this often to run errands in town, I actually have an unwritten rule that if I'm going somewhere in town I MUST ride my bike.  I also have taken cycling to a whole new world since I started spinn class.. basically when I ride I NEVER stop peddling!!  Not to slow down, not on a down hill.. I use my gears and my legs NEVER stop moving!!  Well.. today I figured I'd do a long ride originally I thought I'd head out and do 10 miles or something.  Sounds fun...

But as I left my house I started thinking "why not take them on that 21 miler?" I mean.. I did 21 miles the other day on my own and totally didn't die... and even though I knew it would be MUCH harder I just kept telling myself "It's not a race! I can totally do this!  I've got all day!" I was feeling incredibly ambitious! ;)   About 5 miles into it that saying "overly ambitious" popped into my head and I held onto that thought the rest of the way.  How can one be OVERLY ambitious?  Screw that... it's impossible.  Saying you were overly ambitious is saying that something is impossible.  But it's simply not true.  One thing I've learned from this journey is that so many of the limits I had were in my head.  I learned to really embrace the idea that that which doesn't kill me makes me stronger.  So it became my montage as I pulled those boys up hill after hill.. that which doesn't kill me makes me stronger... pain is weakness leaving your body... there is no such thing as being overly ambitious... I will NOT die.. I will get home eventually... AND I DID! ;)

Life happens whether we are ambitious.. or sitting on the couch.  Why not push past those false limits?  Why not set goals that might seem "overly ambitious" because NOTHING feels as amazing as doing something you never thought you could do... or proving to doubters that it's possible!!

Set HUGE goals... and work your ass off to achieve them! :)

My Favorite Archive

I wrote this post at the end of the first competition I had ever done!  It's probably my favorite.  Hope you enjoy this flash from the past! ;)

When I started this competition we were asked to announce our weight loss goals. At the time I said 50 lbs for the comp. It is a five month comp so why not right? I never realized what losing 50 lbs actually meant, what difference it would make on my life SO... here's a countdown of how losing 50 lbs has transformed my world!

10. I SLEEP at night!! I used to snore from all the weight on my stomach. I always felt tired and woke up a million times in the night! NOW... I sleep. I feel rested. LOVE not being tired all the time.

9. My wedding ring and class ring fit!! That hasn't happened in like 10 years!

8. I can wrap a bathroom towel around my body. This might not be something you smaller people can't even comprehend. But the bigger you are, it gets to the point where you can NOT touch the two sides of the towel together, let alone overlap them.

7. No more of those pictures you see and think... I'm not really that big am I? For the last 10 years, I hide from cameras but for whatever reason, I seem to always be in Christmas pics. It's always that crazy side profile and EVERY year I think... Ugh... am I seriously that big? Now I do the opposite. I don't recognize myself in pics.... Can't wait to get to the point that I just look at pics and not worry about my size!

6. New Friends! This competition has been so incredible for me because I have managed to meet a great group of women!! It's been fantastic to do girls nights and have fun with new people. I am so glad that ya'll have put up with me... even with my obsessive nature! ;o)

5. Belts that fit. Well... I never actually wore belts before because I was squeezed so tight into my jeans that there was no way they were going anywhere. Now I use belts and I they actually fit without increasing the amount of fat that hangs out of my jeans. I owned 2 belts before the comp and couldn't wear either of them. It's so fun to watch yourself shrink via the holes in a belt!

4. Goodbye Mushroom Top If you look at my now pics, you can see that I still have a belly roll. I am going to keep working on that but I just want to say a FOREVER FAREWELL to the mushroom top. (Some of you might call it a "muffin top" but umm... for me it was FAR greater than that... thus I call it a mushroom top!) I think that when you get to a certain size you start to REFUSE to buy bigger pants and then the mushroom top starts to spread. Now I don't mind wearing a bigger size to avoid the look... I have NOT eliminated my love handles, but they are getting smaller.

3. Stamina Okay... take it however you want to. I mean it in any way you can imagine. ;o)

2. Self Control While I do feel like I've lost my mind on more than one occasion during this journey, I have learned that I have an amazing amount of self-control. I've always been one of those people who COMPLETELY BELIEVES that there is no limit to what an individual has accomplished. We are the only ones standing in our way! It takes a lot of self-discipline. And while I'm no master, I've come a long way from where I was 5 months ago.

1. FINISH WHAT YOU START! This concept, that I never followed through with any thing is what I committed to at the beginning of the challenge. It was my number one priority, before weight loss or anything else. I just had to prove to myself i could do it and I'm so excited to say that I FINISHED!! I never gave up. I did not let excuses get in the way. I learned so much in this competition about myself. And I'm excited to take on new challenges. Like college courses. :o) I have always known that this was a huge problem for me and I'm SO glad that at least this time, I followed through!

THANKS TO ALL THE GALS IN THIS COMPETITION FOR PUSHING ME, SUPPORTING ME, AND THE OCCASIONAL SMACK TALK. THIS COMPETITION HAS CHANGED ME FOREVER!! THAT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME!

Week 2

This week was a little insane complete with the placement of braces and a lot of protein shakes.  I laughed out loud when I read the suggestions for what to eat after the braces were placed (mashed potatoes and milkshakes!) REALLY???

Brandy was watching my boys when I went to the orthodontist and when I got back she gave me a gift!!  It was in a cute bag with scented tissue paper and it was.... UNSWEETENED APPLESAUCE!!  And I tell you what it was my savior! 

This week has been pretty good on the exercise and weight loss front with a 4 lb loss!!  I am assuming that some of that is contributed to last week being that time of the month but I am excited to feel a little safer in my "happy weight zone" again!! 

This morning I ventured out on a long bike ride and burned a whopping 1250 calories (according to my heart rate monitor) in 1 hour and 22 minutes of riding!  21 miles on the bike... my butt hurts! ;) 

My husbands job seems to be more and more stressful everyday which means life is being hard!!  But I'm coping and dealing and doing it without double stuffed oreos! :)  Hope you are all doing amazing!

7 days gone!

This past week has been sort of an emotional roller coaster.  Interestingly I was asked by a new friend something along the lines of "but isn't your husband happy that you are doing something you love?" (we were talking about my husbands frustration with being left home so I can workout) to which I responded simply "NO!" I actually felt guilty about this answer as my husband has been willing to let me do things (even though he's not happy about it).  Then DH and I were talking the other day about the triathlon and when I told him it was $60 he took all my guilt away with his response: "I love how you can justify blowing money on stupid shit!" And somehow he managed to roll his eyes and gawk at me in such a way that I nearly cried! BUT I did not respond. 

Here is my justification for blowing money on "stupid shit".

 Reaching a new goal, doing something you've never done, proving to yourself that it's possible, is worth it!! 

So I will blow $60 on a triathlon and it will be worth EVERY DAMN PENNY!!!

On the weight loss front I successfully got rid of 1.8 lbs this week.  At first I had a hard time with this number but really... if I can lose 1.8 every week for 5 weeks that's 9 lbs!!!  I have 4 more weeks before Elise and I weigh in and I'm going to keep up the hard work.  The best part of all of this for me has definitely been putting myself back on my priority list.  Oddly enough the hardest part has been the conflict this causes in my marriage.  BLAH!!

Going for it!!

So in June I ran the Utah Valley Half Marathon and loved it!!  I loved it ENOUGH to make a goal to do the full marathon next year AND qualify for Boston.  What I didn't realize is how REALLY attainable that goal was.  For whatever reason I thought the qualifying time for Boston was 3:30 but it turns out its 3:40!!  This pace in only about 20 seconds below my last half pace so with real hardcore training I could absolutely qualify for Boston next year!!  I'm SO SO SO excited!! 

BRING ON BOSTON BABY!!

35 days of perfection!!

Okay.. so.. my inlaws are coming home from the Phillipinnes in September.  They've been gone for a year and a half which means... when they left.. I looked like this:

That would be me hiding behind the baby! ;)
 We have done a lot of skyping and they have seen plenty of pictures BUT.. nothing is as shocking as reality and so....

I am commited to 35 days of perfection!!  We are talking perfect eating, (as in no processed carbs) plenty of water consumption, 5-7 days of exercise AND some serious p90x resistance training.  My goal??  Basically I want to look like a rock star! I am not only going to be seeing my inlaws but a lot of extended family that I haven't seen since I lost weight! 

Today I made a little wager with  my SIL although I think we need to get a little more specific.. regardless... we are in a 5 week competition and it is ON!!  Honestly though... I would be happy losing NOTHING as long as my body was rock hard and HOT HOT HOT!!!!

So tomorrow starts the beginning of perfection!  I'm thrilled! :)  It's also perfect timing as I'm training for a 1/2 triathlon!!  YAY YAY YAY!!! (Oh not too mention the whole getting braces in10 days thing!!) Maybe if I get brave I'll put up some "before pics" in the next couple of days!!  I KNOW I can do this!!  10 lbs in 5 weeks??  YOU GOT IT!! :)

Life!

I found out recently that we have a lot of money in an HRA that we really need to use or lose.. which started me on my quest to improve my imperfections.  My FIRST attempt was lasik eye surgery.  Basically... I've worn glasses since I was like 7 and I am pretty blind.  UNFORTUNATELY I don't qualify for lasik.  My corneas are too thin for the amount of correction I need!!  They Dr. told me to wait for technology to catch up to me... DANGIT!!
So next I hit the dentist hoping they could give me a quick fix/gorgeous smile.  2 different dentists told me to go to an orthodontist and SO..... I'm getting braces on August 25th at the ripe old age of 30.  It may sound slightly insane BUT it will not only fix my smile, it will fix the misalignment in my jaw.  I still haven't decided if I'm going to do top AND bottom braces or just top but right now.. I'm pretty sure I'm just going to do the top.  The bottom won't show in my smile anyway.. and the orthodontist really feels like fixing my top teeth will help bring my jaw forward.  I'm sure no one but me cares about any of this but i had to write it down. 
Hope you are all doing fantastic!

Exercise and me!

So working at the gym was an exciting way to get new contacts but made it incredibly hard for me to exercise (or incredibly easy for me to make excuses).  While I've always been busy with my children, I've never tried to add work into the mix and while I did a lot of lifting while I was working there.... my cardio was in the toilet.  I HATED the cardio machines there and avoided them at all costs.  Occasionally I would hit a class and LOVE it but for the most part.. umm... cardio was out the window. 
This was also starting to reflect on the scale.  I have a "happy weight zone" 120-125 and lately I've been seeing 126-128.  I've had this weird struggle going on with this.  Like I don't want to seem like one of those pyscho skinny bitches saying "UGH!  I HAVE GOT TO LOSE 5 LBS!! "  But the truth is... when you start to get past your happy weight zone and you let a couple lbs go and then a couple more.. pretty soon you've got 20 lbs to lose etc... I feel so dumb even saying it but seriously... I need to lose a few lbs so I can stay in my happy zone.
In comes cardio.  I LOVE cardio.  I had forgotten that for a while.  I was thrilled to go back to spin classes at my little gym (I had not been because they were on nights I had to be at the other place!) So... 2 nights a week I spin and at least 3 additional days a week my ass will be running country roads!  Last night I did about 3.5 miles with a friend and LOVED it (although my eyes are swollen from the hay).  
I just went to register for the warrior dash and my heart is now in my chest.  Somehow.. since the last time I checked... the price has more than doubled.  I can't even imagine NOT doing it.. but I cannot justify spending $75 for it either.  BAH!!  I feel like such a jackass.. I just totally let life run away from me!!
I think I'm going to vomit.

Ditto

Just want to say DITTO!!! 

Blah... I swear to God I'm in self destruct mode!

Extreme?

So.. I met this guy in the park the other day.. well actually he was invited there by Brandy and I think he came with pinning me down in mind.  That's right.. multi-level marketing.  Every multi level marketer in the universe tries to get their claws into me.. even today at the DMV... random strangers couldn't help but give us a sample of their product.  I'm sure this has to do with the fact that my husband and I make a fantastic comedic team in odd public places.  ANYWAY... this guy sells USANA.  Apparently they are fantastic nutritional supplements... blah blah blah. 

So why the blog entry?

We were talking about nutrition and I was talking about clean eating, healthy choices etc.. and he says to me: "It sounds like the diet and lifestyle that you promote might come across as extreme to some people.  Usana has this "renew" plan that is a much easier transition... you know.. you eat NOTHING but our shakes and bars for a week to detox." 

WTF?!?!?  This is the thing.. he was totally right.  It's way easier to sell people on starving themselves for a week then to sell them on eating plenty of fruits and veggies and giving up sugar.  Go figure!

If you are interested I'm going to start selling meal replacement shakes...

 NOT!!!

Patience

So.. I've come to realize lately how our societies NEED to have everything NOW has dramatically increased our nations obesity rates.  Seriously.. fast food?!? What could be better... I'm hungry!!  Feed me now!  I'm not going to lie.. if there was a drive thru window that served squash, with chicken.. seasoned to perfection and sauteed with just a tiny bit of PURE VIRGIN OLIVE OIL... I would SO live there.

But as much as fast food is contributing to obesity with its GINORMOUS portion sizes and huge amounts of processed carbs and saturated fat... another huge culprit lurks in the shape of FAD DIETING!!
So here's the deal.  We want to lose weight and we want to lose it NOW!!!  When our new healthy lifestyle doesn't turn over big numbers we want to throw it out the window and take diet pills that make us poop our pants.  It's ridiculous/frustrating and INCREDIBLY unhealthy.. but we do it anyway.. because WE NEED IT NOW!!  The sad thing is.. when the fad dieting turns out to be too hard.. or too expensive.. or we've pooped our pants one too many times... WE GIVE UP!! A year later we decide to try again.  This time we are the same size, maybe even a little heavier and once again our INSTANT weight loss scheme proves to be too difficult and we prove to ourselves that weight loss is IMPOSSIBLE. 

So here's my point.  You know that year... that went by between trying one fad diet and another... in that year, had healthy living been adopted... YOU COULD HAVE REACHED YOUR GOAL!!  I mean honestly, sticking to healthy eating for an entire year is going to yield you BIG numbers.  SOOO.. even though  taking an approach which requires you to make permanent changes to your lifestyle means you must be patient.. it also means that you are changing the way you live.  YOU STOP DIETING... and you start living. :)

Moments to remember!

Remember back in February 09 when I posted this 

(click on the link to read the entry)! 

Anyway.. I was thrilled to actually BE the weight on my drivers license!!  175 lbs. 

Well.. I have yet to get a new drivers license.. I know lame right?  So the other night I got all dolled up for a hot date with my main squeeze and went out with my bro and SIL.  After hitting a yummy mexican joint we headed off to walk up and down old town Fort Collins and decided to stop off in a couple of bars just to see what they were.  The first bar we went to the bouncer was an AHOLE!!  He actually commented on the fact that he was an ahole... the next bar we went to the bouncer looked at my I.D.  He was READING numbers etc... he looked at me and actually looked me UP AND DOWN!!  I was a little embarrassed (and tipsy) so I said something like, "I lost 80 lbs last year and haven't got a new license!"  He looks at me and says, "You look @#$ing AMAZING!" Um... Thank you bouncer at Octane 100!!  You made my night! ;)

30.... OY!

So.. yesterday I celebrated my 30th birthday.  I've been having a really hard time with the idea of being 30.  I'm not sure WHY!!  I mean seriously??? 30 is like the peak for women!  Go to any running event and the female winners are always 30 something.  I've even heard women peak sexually in their 30's!  This is supposed to be like the best decade of my life... but.. Jimminy Cricket... 30???

So.. maybe I had a little freak out BUT... I decided to get a nose piercing the other day! It wasn't a spur of the moment decision.. but I wonder if it's some sort of "oh geeze I'm 30" crisis?

Regardless of whether or not I look like an idiot... I kind of like it! ;) 

Work has been interesting!  I've been meeting a lot of people and trying to get the word out there that I exhist, that I get it, and that I sincerely want to help people find success in adopting a healthy lifestyle!!  I had my first team weight loss small group training class yesterday and I actually had one person show up!!  I'm so excited to see what happens tomorrow with the class.  If I can get 4 people there each time, it makes it "financially" worth it.. but honestly.. if I get one person there.. it's still one person I'm helping and.. that's kind of why I'm doing this right?  I really do LOVE meeting people who are genuinely interested in not just weight loss.. but weight loss for LIFE!!  The nice thing about being in a health club is that the people there GET that exercise and nutrition are important... anyway.. it's fantastic and slowly but surely, I'm going to be a HUGE success!!

The new comp started and it's much smaller than the last one!  This is FANTASTIC because we can have a closer knit group of people.. but kind of a bummer because we just don't have the ZILLIONS of dollars we have when we have a ton of people.  I actually threw around the idea of joining just to be the 20th person but honestly, the batteries in my scale are dead and I keep forgetting to go to walmart.  I weighed myself yesterday... I'm right around 125.  I'm good with that! :) 

I'm excited to see this group of people kick some booty!  I LOVE helping people succeed.  Good luck to everyone this time around. 

P.S.

If you are a blog stalker who maybe has questions you would love me to answer, feel free to email me @ kariscomp@yahoo.com OR find me on facebook http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/karilynn.adams .  Till next time! :)

Half Marathon

I haven't posted about my second half marathon cause I kept hoping Mindy would be posting pics that I could steal.  Alas.. she hasn't blogged in 3 weeks and I want to get this blogged so I don't lose it!

On Saturday June 12th I ran my second half marathon.  I was so excited to run it with my BFF Mindy, my SIL (also a BFF), my brother, my aunt and my uncle!!  I was not so excited about the prospect of rain or being at the pick up point at 4 o'clock in the morning!  OY!!

The half marathon course was gorgeous and my official time was 2:00:48.  (2 hours and 48 seconds!) I am so excited but also frustrated with this time because.. I wasted 4 whole minutes waiting to go and eventually going POTTY!!   I had no choice.. it was stop... or face my butt exploding!  SO SO SO NOT COOL!! (AND WAY TMI!)

I did stop my gps/timer when I stopped to potty and my time on my gps was 1:56:07 so of course I like that much better.  REGARDLESS.. my last half was done in 2:15 ish... so of course I have got to be thrilled with this time.

I'm excited to do a few more events this fall before the weather goes to pot.  I'll be doing a 10k on the 17th of July, and I'll have a weekend of events in August.  Oyster Race Saturday, Warrior Dash Sunday.  I am also doing the bareable adventure race in September and then I'm going to do the Boyd Lake State Park Half Marathon in November!!  I've decided after running the last half that I want to do that event again next year but next year, I want to run the whole marathon AND I want to run it in Boston qualifying time.. which means I have to cut another 50 seconds off my 1/2 marathon pace. 

I just wanted to write this all down... so I can never forget how far I've come, or where I'm headed next! :)
Looking forward to the next comp starting July 1st!! WAHOO!!

I'm alive!!

Wow!! You know you've ignored your blog when you go to type in the url and it doesn't automatically pop up!!  So many small successes are happening but they all seem to be one liners... so here are just a few of the new/exciting things going on in my world!

I climbed this crazy course on the rock wall where you have to go over this ledge!  It rocked!  I felt FANTASTIC... and I looked right at my husband when I succeeded and said "That's HOT, don't lie.. I'm frickin' amazing!"  To which he did not respond.

I went on a bike ride and frisbee golfing adventure with my family and in the end we ended up on this dirt bike/ramp course thing... you know.. going up and down hills and bumps and around curves and all that stuff.  I LOVED IT!!  I actually had a couple of moments when I just couldn't believe that I was doing it!  There I was, this 200 lb woman... except I'm NOT!  NOT ANYMORE!!  I love moments when I am reminded of how far I've come and how much LIFE I've taken back!  LOVE IT!!

I've started my new career as a personal trainer.  Today is my first official session with my first official client... SO EXCITED!!  It feels so slow to start but this week I finally have my picture on the wall, my business cards next to everyone elses, my hours in the studio and an overall excitement for DOING IT!!  I love this career path.  I chose it to inspire/educate and help others and finally... I've got the opportunity!  YAY!!

I still struggle.  I struggle mostly with personal relationships with my hubby.  I still feel very unsupported most of the time but I am learning that it's really all on me.  I need to stop backing down and start asking for things I want even if I'm sure it's going to induce a tantrum.  Life is too short to live in fear of getting "that look".  I'm not over it.. but I'm getting there.

The competition ends on Saturday HOLY COW!!  I'm shocked/amazed/thrilled at the huge progress that has happened in so many lives.  I've been asked repeatedly to do another one and I've decided to go for it but this time.. I'm going to have HELP!!  YAY!!  I have a gal to help with articals to keep the comp blog fresh and a gal to just keep me on task and do whatever I need!  I'm excited to take a little break and start the next comp on July 1st.  I also think that 4 months is long enough so it will go till November 1st.  (Talk about incentive to not indulge on halloween!)  I have decided to make the buy in slightly MORE $50 and to limit the entries to a max of 30 people. 

So sorry this blogging has fallen on the backburner.  I am recommited to getting back on it!  I LOVE all of you... keep working hard at reaching those goals.  And remember "TRYING" is planning to fail!  Stop trying and do it!

La-di-da

This is my first entry on the weightlosswars website.  What do you think?

Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. -Jim Ryun


Weight loss is a challenge. Really, I am the first to admit that it's NOT easy. I reflect on my own "weight loss journey" as fighting for my life.

At 28 years old I found myself tipping the scales at just over 200 lbs on my 5'2" body. Was I pleased? Absolutely not!! Did I know what the hell I was going to do about it? Of course not. I just wanted to be that thin person I knew must be in there somewhere.

I had spent my entire adult life being overweight. I gained my weight during my 4 pregnancies and never lost anything after my kiddos were born. I also had spent my entire adult life in a Have-Be-Do cycle. If I HAD the time/money/energy/gym membership/personal trainer/personal chef [insert your excuse here] etc etc etc.... I would BE able to do what it takes to lose weight and I would finally DO it!! It wasn't until I reversed the cycle that I found my success. I resulted to BE that thin person... to eat like a thin person, exercise like a thin person, value myself as a thin person and THEN... I found success. BE, DO, HAVE! So much better! :)

Anyway.. back to motivation and habit. Motivation... we all have it at some point. Maybe it's what brought you to this site. We all thrive on motivation. We cling on and pray it sticks around a while. Motivation truly is what gets us started OVER and OVER again. But I think we give more credit to motivation then necessary.

Weight loss is fairly simple. Regardless of what approach you take it's all about replacing bad habits with good ones. Habits are what control our lives. If you are in the habit of doing the dishes every evening after dinner, 9 times out of 10 you are going to do just that. Occasionally you will feel "unmotivated" and let them sit for an hour or two.. maybe even over night but bottom line... those dishes will wait and eventually you will have to face them! :)

So here you are at the beginning/middle/end of a journey to create new habits and YOU are the only person standing in your way. Maybe you are TERRIFIED. Maybe you are excited. Maybe you have no idea what the hell you are going to do! ;) Change your focus. This journey is NOT about a number on a scale. This journey is about gaining health. This journey is about developing NEW habits that will give you success. This moment defines where you go from here. Be it!! Do it!! and Have success!

The bright side of life! :)

I got the job. I am OFFICIALLY a "Fitness Specialist" at the North Club for Miramont! Tomorrow is my orientation with my supervisor.. then an orientation again on Thursday for the club as a whole. Hopefully tomorrow I'll have some sort of "training" schedule...
SO EXCITED!

I lied

I lied when I said I "don't care if you think I'm selfish." It was a fib...

I can't get over it. I keep thinking that I must somehow be unbalanced... that I need to figure this out.... but after 2 weeks of distress I've discovered something.

I can't give to anyone when I don't give to myself.

I have spent 2 weeks being self-loathing and depressed. I've gone out of my way to NOT go out of my way for me. I've skipped the gym.. I've skipped the whole foods store... I've tried to make due with what my husband and children INSIST on making due with and as a result: I HATE LIFE! I hate everything about it. I haven't upped my game and become more giving to you or anyone else because I am NOT CAPABLE OF IT in this state of mind.

I NEED to be selfish. I HAVE to make time for me. I HAVE to feed me right in order to be happy, healthy, outgoing, kind, energetic, beautiful, eager to serve my kiddos, eager to serve you.

You have to choose... do you want depressed, self-loathing, lazy me OR do you want happy, energetic, selfish me? There is no balance.. it's one or the other... I am an extreme woman... there is no in between.

Life Happens

Life has been beyond stressful for me. My weight training class ended and my hubby has taken my obligation free evenings as an opportunity for him to get caught up at work. I do not blame him for this... I want him to be less stressed.. but oh me oh my... being home alone with my kids for 12-13 hours a day (and NOT having time away in the evenings) takes its toll on me. NOT TO MENTION.. he is salaried so I can't even use retail therapy as a stress reliever! Instead.. I sit at home and play on facebook, and think about everything I want to do and be and see and occasionally... cry.
Exercise makes me a better me. I am a better everything to everyone when I take a little time for myself. It is EXHAUSTING to try to be everything to everyone all the time.. when there is no time for me. I'm tired. I would love to get out this weekend... but the forecast is WET!! I will most definitely be doing 8 miles on the treadmill on Sunday so there is my bonus but SHEESH! I need a day at the spa! Anyone want to pay? I'm good company! ;o)
PS. I'm still going to the gym at 5 am... but when you go that early you feel lazy the whole rest of the day. UGH!

Hard work

Just wanted everyone to know that I've gone through the interview process to start training at a club in Fort Collins. HOPEFULLY I'll be hearing from someone in the next couple of days! WISH ME LUCK! :)

Selfish?

This weekend was ROUGH... not because of anything I did... but because someone very close to me has decided that I need to know how incredibly selfish I am.

Why am I selfish?

Because I go to the gym in the mornings and I cook meals that are healthy even if people don't like them.

Being selfish....

that used to be one of my excuses.

I couldn't take "time away from my family" to get to the gym.

I couldn't buy produce that was just going to go to waste.

I refused to leave my husband home with the kiddos... to avoid him getting frustrated...

INSTEAD.. I sat around my house and got fatter and fatter... until I was 200 lbs and couldn't take it anymore.

Now... I'm healthy, thin and active and apparently SELFISH!! Here's the difference though.

I DON'T CARE IF YOU THINK I'M SELFISH!!!!

I don't do this for me.. I do this to be around for my family. To be an active part of my childrens lives. To be a happier/healthier wife to my hubby. I feed them healthier food because I LOVE THEM!! Someday maybe they will see it... for now... I'll just be selfish... because honestly... all I want is to keep them as long as possible and I suppose... THAT is selfish!

Inspiration?

Archives... one year ago!
Kids say the darndest things
So the other day I was talking to my boys about running... we are planning on running a 5k as a family. I must have mentioned that it's hard and sometimes their bodies will hurt when my 7 year old looked at me and said "Mom, pain is just weakness leaving your body!" (This, I'm sure, is something he's been taught in gymnastics!) So.. because I am an "over-thinker" I was up most of the night thinking about this statement!

I think that through all of life's struggles, it takes the pain to make us stronger people. I also think of those times when I'm at the gym and it hurts. I know that when I push past the pain, I'm building endurance, and when I let it get the better of me, I feel like I've failed. So the next time I'm on the treadmill and I think maybe I'm pushing myself too hard, or I'm tempted to change my goal by 1/2 a mile, I'm going to imagine the weakness drifting away! Because my little guy was absolutely right and in the end, all of the pain is worth the strength you gain when you push through it. :o)

I haven't blogged in over a week.. pretty insane for me BUT.. I'm in that blogging funk again.. where I feel like I've lost my relatability factor. Like I've been kicked out of the fat girl club and now no matter what I say... people are just going to roll their eyes and tell their computer screen that I couldn't possibly know how they feel! It's been a week. Not good.. not horrible.. just keepin' on.

Eating to live... or eating to die?

I've noticed a trend with me. For the most part I LOVE LIFE!! I'm a pretty positive, happy, person and I have found a ton of confidence and LOVE for everyday life especially as I have continued to reach goals. I believe that life is beautiful... and most days I want to live till I'm 383. I eat right because I know that what I put into my mouth directly effects how long I will be around for my husband, children and family. I EAT TO LIVE!! Because I LOVE LIVING!!!

So.. this weekend I realized something. I AM NOT AN EMOTIONAL EATER... some days though... when I feel like I'm being beaten down OVER AND OVER... when I feel like my efforts are in disarray.. that my balance is off... that I'm under appreciated and over criticised... when I'm PMSy, bloated and exhausted...those days.. when I feel like life is hard... I eat to die.

I don't eat sugar to "treat myself" I eat it to PUNISH MYSELF! I don't over-indulge or go crazy on portion sizes because I have no self control... I do it because I am intentionally trying to take minutes off my life. I surely don't want to die... but in moments of struggle... I surrender myself to my own sabotage and EAT like it doesn't matter. Like LIFE doesn't matter. Like being around for my kids and grandkids and 383rd birthday DOESN'T MATTER!!

It's been a rough weekend. And there has been plenty of available bad choices. I ate like I didn't care if there was no tomorrow... and today, I'm switching gears.

TODAY.. my punishment is EXERCISE!! Today.. I'm going to get to the gym (again) and kick my own ass. Today I'm reclaiming those minutes I ate away over the weekend.

HEAVEN HELP ME MAKE TODAY A GOOD DAY!

Things that make you go hmmm....

Yesterday I went and got my body fat tested using the "gold" standard of body fat composition testing.. AKA Hydrostatic body fat testing. Basically you sit in a scale in water, (This one was like a big diaper) and you blow ALL of the air out of your lungs. Once your lungs are empty, you emerge your entire body under water. The idea is that the only 2 elements lighter than water are FAT and AIR... so... the scale weighs EVERYTHING BUT those two elements. Then they take your current rate and do some math to determine your Body Fat Percentage! This is supposed to be pretty fool proof for a few reasons...

1. It does not require a person to be dehydrated/starved as the weight of food particles does not count against you.

2. It is not positional like BEI units (hand held or scales) which can show a completely different reading based on where you are standing on the scale or at what height you are holding the handheld device.

HOWEVER... I did notice a few things. The scale jumps around and some dude has to attempt to determine what it actually is reading (it's like a food scale in the produce aisle).

Okay.. so they do it and they write your stuff down and you have to call later.. when they are done doing all the weighing to get your results.

I called like 2 minutes after they said I can call and got my result. I was CONFUSED... really? Hmm.. okay.. thanks. Then I hung up the phone and thought about it some more. I thought about the girl who went in the water after me and thought... hmm.. maybe they gave me HER RESULT!

So.. I picked up the phone and called them AGAIN! I got a different guy and asked him if he could double check. He sort of chuckled at me and went to his list then said, "KARI ADAMS.....

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

17.76%!!!!!!!!"

Holy Toledo Batman! I am AT MY GOAL!!

LOVE IT!!

P.S. I'm still not completely convinced that this result is right.. that buff girl behind me could easily have pulled this number BUT... my favorite Lady LISA says she absolutely believes if from looking at me... I will do it again next month and see what happens!

I love/hate to love hate you!

So... I've been doing this class with this trainer and I really had no idea what to expect when I paid the money for it. Basically.. we do the same thing every time we go. Kind of frustrating. Like.. I paid a lot of money to continue doing the same thing. Then today she told me I'm doing everything wrong.. which is fine.. I would like to do it right.. but we are on the 4th week doing the same stuff and she just mentioned it. I sort of feel picked on! (She only pointed out one thing I'm doing wrong which I was doing wrong because of the way she was describing it. ) She pointed out that my chest is stronger than my back. Yeah! I got that! THANKS!
I did push myself alot in the class and I ran home after cause I had to drop myself off after soccer practice. Anyway.. I've been really frustrated lately with my workouts and diet. Like I don't know if I'm doing too much or not enough and I just want to feel good with where I'm at.
BLAH!

Love this ARTICLE!!

Check out Moi's blog entry today! It is AMAZING! :)

Food!

Weekends are hard. Probably because my hubby hates being home so we spend way too much time out and about and EATING out and about. Today I went out on a limb and ordered something with a [wheat] bun (normally I would omit the bun!) and when it came out it had MAYO on it! I went to bring it back and my husband got all annoyed with me... like one blob of mayo isn't gonna kill ya. So I ate that too. Then I got home and figured "what the hell... why not eat this.. and that.. and this... and that.." now I totally understand why people are bulimic. I would LOVE to puke my brains out right now. I feel like crap.

Food is fuel... not an antidepressant. UGH!

My Butt Injury

So.. I've been recovering from a butt injury ever since I went trampolining with my sisters! At one point when I went to sit I slipped and hit my coccyx on the edge of a couple of trampolines. Anyway... it has been sore since that day... about 1.5 weeks now. It hasn't stopped me... but it's pretty damn funny when I "forget" and go to do something without thinking about it. WOWZA! People think I just randomly like to say potty words when I sit down. BWAH HA HA!

As for exercise and food and weight loss? Yesterday I had a different kind of kick in the ass when I went to weigh in at the gym for that body fat percentage test. Basically... it said I had no change... which is pretty frustrating, especially because I CAN SEE HUGE CHANGES IN MY BODY!! The scale also said I had gained but I KNOW I have lost... like.. my scale at home said I weighed MORE than their scale said I did at the beginning of the comp but yesterday my scale was 3 lbs less than their scale! WTH?!?!? I had to find comfort in the truth... that the scale they use to determine BF% is NOT a definite and fairly inaccurate [basically those types of mechanisms are incredibly finicky.. the difference could be where you are standing on the scale... plus it took her like 4 times attempting to make it work before I could even stand on the stupid thing!]. I scheduled an appointment for a hydrostatic body fat test next Saturday... and I can't RUN from those results!

The most frustrating thing about the weigh in yesterday was the way the trainer that weighed me in approached my results. Basically she told me that I MUST NOT BE EATING ENOUGH! REALLY?!?! She acted like I'm incredibly active and should eat more but then last night at nutrition and again today at SPINN she kept going on and on about how many people were complaining and that none of them were working hard enough to complain and that you get the results you put in and I'm like... REALLY?!??! I'm at the gym every damn day... she just kept giving me the impression that she thinks I don't work hard in the same 24 hours that she said I am incredibly active. I'M STUMPED!

On a lighter note I decided to see where I'm at! I made a chart of my prescheduled workouts for the next month... This week I'm going to track all of my calories AND wear my heartrate monitor for ALL of my workouts to see exactly how many additional calories I'm burning on any given day. I'm going to revamp my food and try a zig-zag approach to eating. (Basically I'm going to increase my calories on days I burn a TON!) I also am going to up my protein intake. I know I need to do some serious strength training but really have nowhere to put it this month.

Bottom line.. I'm VERY BUTT HURT!! Today is a new day and I am more than prepared to CONTINUE TO BRING IT!!

Just a thought.

I've been thinking a lot lately about why so many people who lose weight gain it all back. Here is what I came up with.

Too many of us approach weight loss as making temporary changes in order to produce permanent results. Unfortunately this is not the case.

Temporary changes yield temporary results.

If you want results that last, you must change your habits indefinitely. Only permanent changes will yield permanent results.

I'm official!

Today I passed my Certified Personal Trainer test! I'm official!! NOW WHAT?!? ;o)

Back from good times!

I just got home after spending 4 days in Utah. It was so fun to be with my family and I even got away with friends one night. It wasn't really challenging to make good food choices, I just had to make VERY REAL CHOICES!! I had to create good options cause they weren't just automatically there.

I had an opportunity to go on a girls night with my sisters and we ended up going to this HUGE trampoline place. Talk about a fantastic workout and a TON of fun! We worked really hard to get pics of us in the air... so so fun!!!

The girls night with friends was definitely fun! This is me with Damon before we went out.. can't you tell he is totally my kiddo?

This is my girls night outfit! Kind of fun stuff!!
So we went out to dinner at a chinese place and I totally embarrassed the girls I was with when I insisted on finding out what the crap I was eating. There were these white noodle things under my chicken and I was umm... not PLEASED! I didn't realize that my chicken wrap was goign to come out with deep fried, puffed up rice! UGH! I had to try to eat around the noodles and then the gals insisted we go to a new DESSERT BAR called "The Chocolate"!! The CHOCOLATE!?!? REALLY?!?!? I actually had to deal with a total social dilemna there. I just didn't know if PASSING on the dessert was really a choice I needed to make. Like was I isolating myself by not just having fun and giving myself a break?!!? As I'm sitting there contemplating if I really am sick in the head for not getting a 600 calorie piece of simple carb/fat packed deliciousness... in walks Tyson from the reality TV show, Survivor. I happen to be a HUGE Survivor fan and although Tyson isn't like a "fan favorite" he is from Utah. So... being from Utah you cheer for your home crowd. I've always enjoyed his crazy antics and was excited to see him back on this all star season! ANYWAY!! It was a fantastic distraction. I stopped focusing on the chocolate drizzled cheesecake and started trying to figure out if it would be "appropriate" to ask to take a pic with him cause HELLO... I HAD TO GET IT FOR MY BLOG!! I didn't really want to bug him while he was out with his friends BUT.. my friend is pretty fearless and got me this great pic opportunity!!

Turns out he's my friends cousin... the thought that he's just Brooke's cousin makes me think hmm... I SHOULD TOTALLY BE ON SURVIVOR!! Maybe that will be my next fun task to take on!!!
I also got an opportunity to workout with Lisa while I was there! I LOVE HER GUTS!! It was awesome, butt kickin' fun times!
Anyway... I'm excited to be home and able to get back on MY track! Hope you guys are doing fantastic! :o)

Just sayin' ;o)

In case you were wondering... my last post is sort of meant to MESS with DEBBIE! ;o) BUT.. since I realize that some people might think I'm insane I just want to clarify. I was not disappointed about the chip.. not a big deal. BUT... the fact that I put it in my mouth without thinking about it is a problem. I want each food choice, GOOD OR BAD, to be a conscious decision!!! I agree that one bite won't make me gain weight BUT one bite generally leads to more bites. I still maintain that the "one bite won't hurt" mentality is detrimental in weight loss! Please oh please... don't buy into it.

One accidental bite is an opportunity to learn.

One intentional bite is an excuse to eat badly because its "just one bite."

Yesterday was NEAR PERFECT

I only made one mistake. 1/2 of a french onion sunchip.. once it was in my mouth I was like DANGIT!! I quickly gave the rest of it to my child... but I totally didn't rush to the sink to spit it out! ;o) I chewed and swallowed and hmm.. that was so salty and delicious! Today... no sunchips for me! ;)

20 ozs water

BF:

1/3 cup oats, 1/3 cup ff cottage cheese, 3 egg whites, 1/2 t smart balace (I LOVE THESE PANCAKES!!)

2 cups coffee

1.5T Sugar free french vanilla creamer

1cutie

Snack:

Protein Bar

1/2 of one french onion sunchip

20 0zs water

Lunch:

3 cups lettuce, 3 ozs chicken, 2T light sour cream, 1/8 cup shredded colby jack cheese, 1/4 avocado

20 0zs water

Snack:

4 ozs chicken,

4 ozs granny smith, no sugar added applesause

1 T mustard

1 cutie

2 cups coffee

1.5 T sugar free french vanilla creamer

(This snack was inspired by Debbie!)

20 ozs water

Dinner:

1.5 cups spaghetti squash with

1/4 cup spaghetti sauce, 2 ozs ground turkey, 3 mushrooms, 1 T light sour cream

20 ozs water

Exercise:

45 minute spinn class

45 minute weight training class

Weigh in for my kick your butt challenge!

So this morning this is my weigh in.. I'm not disappointed but realize that this is LESS than my ticker says. In order to reach my ticker goal I will have to lose 5.74%. So all you have to do is lose 5.75% and you have braggin' rights forever! ;o)

Kat and Em.. if you are in... for pride and glory and bragging rights.. you can send a pic of your weight with the date and a fork to kariscomp@yahoo.com. There is no money involved.. just a good ass-kickin' month! For those of you in the comp who have decided to take on this (near impossible ;o) ) endeavor. We can use your March 5th weight and go from there!) April 5th.. we'll see if I've done it! AND if YOU'VE BEAT ME!!

Household item!

Hey.. I haven't weighed in in a while! I NEED a household item!

ANYONE comment and leave a household item for me to use so I can post my weight for you guys! I know there has GOT to be a way to authenticate it!

THANKS! :o)

P.S. perfect day #1 looked like this:

20 ozs water

BF: 3 egg whites, 1/3 cup FF cottage cheese, 1/3 cup oats (all made into pancakes)

1 cutie

1/2 teaspoon smart balance butter stuff

2 cups coffee with 1.5 T creamer

Mid morning Meal:

I cutie

6 ozs sirloin, 3 mushrooms, 1/2 t smart balance

20 ozs of water

Lunch: 1.5 cups lettuce, 1.5 cups spinach, 4 ozs chicken, 1/8 cup shredded colby jack cheese, 1/4 avocado, 2 T light sour cream (this would be a salad)

1 cutie

20 0zs of water

Mid afternoon meal: Protein bar (20 G protein, 200 calories)

20 ozs of water

2 cups coffee

1.5 T creamer

Dinner: 1 zuchinni, 2 mushrooms, 4 ozs chicken, 1 t olive oil

15 ozs water

Plus an hour at the gym in the a.m. which included a 25 minute 5k! ;o)

Debbie mentioned something about beating me at my own game. Why not just play MY GAME?!?

How'd she do that?

Here are the rules I've been following to lose weight. These are NOT a diet.. they are my life and they work! ;o) I occasionally send this to friends so if it seems worded funny, that would be why! Most of the time.. people don't want to listen.. or think they have it all figured out. Either way, I thought the only way to level the playing field for you poor souls who have accepted the challenge is to SHOW YOU WHAT I'M DOING!!
#1- Drink 16 ozs of water first thing in the morning.. before ANYTHING else!
#2- Eat breakfast within 30 minutes of waking up.. STICK TO unprocessed carbs (like oatmeal, WHOLE GRAINS, and combine it with a protein... egg whites are fantastic.. low in calories.. high in protein. ALSO drink 8 ozs of water with your breakfast.
#3- Eat 2-3 hours after breakfast. Same rules apply. Always combine a protein with your carbs so a snack could be an apple with [natural] peanut butter... I know there are calories in peanut butter but it's a great snack and it's actually good for you!!
#4- Lunch!!! WHOLE GRAINS!! NO LUNCH MEAT!! A chicken salad is great for lunch. Try it with balsamic vinegar dressing or splurge and do "light" sour cream. Fewer calories then dressing and it makes me feel like I'm eating Mexican food... which I LOVE!! PS WATER!!!!!
#5- Afternoon snack! This is a good time to do some sort of protein shake.. with 15 [unsalted as raw as you can get] almonds.

#6- Dinner! For the most part you can eat what your family is eating. AVOID overindulging at dinner... your goal is to eat 200-300 calories every meal so portion sizes are uber important. ALSO.. stick to WHOLE GRAINS!! If you are doing rice.. make sure it's brown.. tortillas and pastas should be whole grain... you can also substitute most noodles with squash! LOVE IT! WATER!!
#7 - DRINK LOTS OF WATER!!! AND a decent amount of protein as well... at least 60-80 grams!! ALSO... if you can AVOID processed carbs altogether you will be doing yourself a huge favor! I.E. NO SUGAR... and honestly, if you want to do breads, tortillas, pastas, your best option is to MAKE THEM YOURSELF. A great bread alternative is Ezekiel bread which can be found in the refrigerated section of any whole foods store.

#8 - Substitute meats for a LEAN option... ground anything should be turkey... Beef should be lean cuts... so no ribeyes, forget about breakfast meats... turkey is a better option but ALL breakfast meats are just a collage of preservatives, FAT and sodium... both are horrible for you.. (The day I gave up turkey bacon was a little traumatic... but I'm over it now!)

This is what I will be doing. This is what helped me lose those last 20 lbs. This is a way of life I am happy to live! :o)

On that note: I was IMing Amanda the other day and we were talking about the "one bite won't hurt" theory. I also noticed a few people who call me obsessive. ;o) Amanda has also noticed this. HERE'S THE DEAL... I'm not going to tell you one bite won't hurt because I KNOW that one bite can change everything. It's not just that one bite tends to lead to ten.. but one bite changes your focus. It changes the way you think about you.

It takes you one bite FURTHER AWAY FROM YOUR GOAL!

If you were a recovering alcholic I would NOT tell you that one drink won't hurt. I don't think that any of us are much different than this. We are addicted to putting crap in our bodies that is BAD FOR OUR BODIES!! We need to overcome this addiction. We need to stop feeding our addiction (literally). Sure you might relapse. But you need to learn from that moment and get back on the wagon. So.. if you really want to kick ass, you've got to change your focus. Stop feeding your addiction. Stop being a slave to your body. Take control! You are the only person standing in your way.